Sunday, October 14, 2001

So. Better now, at least somewhat.

Spend and hour on the phone with Ev, and only really told him what was up at the end. But it helped. Lots. Even though I feel so silly when telling him those ridiculously insecure thoughts, even though I hate this sobbing and being whiny.
So glad that he's there. So very glad that he'll soon be here. Not that I believe his mere presence will make everything well, everything go away -being happy is MY responsibility not anyone else's- but there will be someone who listens, someone who is there, someone who grounds me. And that will help immensely. And it won't just be someone: it will be him.
And, well, he is the most amazing person I have ever met and I am so glad that he is in my life. Sometimes, I really can not believe that we've met, and that we've been handling this odd relationship so well over these past 2 years. Simply put: I love him. Very much so.


Still haven't worked as much as I had needed to. Am tired, my eyes burn, and I still feel sick. Yeah. Just when I need it.

What a weekend.