Saturday, July 07, 2001

2 hours on the phone.
*sigh* About as good as it gets at the moment.
Ev claimed is was the best he's gotten in recent months. Not that that's too difficult considering he has had just as much partnered sex as me since end of January. :) But it was fab, indeed.
I can't wait to make things real again. And not just hear them and have them in my head. Promised him that I won't let him out of this flat for two days or two weeks or whatever at least when he arrives. He of course wondered whether I'd feed him during that tiem frame. *lmao* I still can't believe he has forgiven me my lack of feeding him when he first stayed here. We were just to busy doing other things, and Ev was just starved, the poor boy. And back then, I didn't even realize how important it is for him to eat, and to eat plenty.

Locking him up for two days....When writing this, I keep imagining how I pick him up in Frankfurt, how we take the train ride home. And yes, what will happen then. *sigh* It'll get real, soon enough. So unbelievable. eeeep. And yes, I will not answer the phone. I will not answer the door. I will not leave the house. I want 2 days in sensory heaven, and I should get them, I think. Oh, the built-up.

Great 2 hours today. I really enjoy talking to him. I always have. - If I wouldn't, we wouldn't be together anyway, but these days, it just flows and feels right. And Mr."I-don't-talk-on-the-phone-for-too-long" had more and more things to tell. :) It was just very normal and nice, and we discussed tons of things and joked around and it was just good.
He noted how much easier it is to talk with me these days, and how much safer I feel with him and in my skin, too, and I guess he's right. Am so much better than around this time last year. And I don't doubt as much these days. The fact he worked so hard to be able to come over this winter and the fact it's all working out (money, job, whatnot) and just...everything....It's just all good at the moment. I feel safe, as strange as it is. I feel close to him, too.

Must be love, love love.....

And this is not just afterglow talk.

Don't have much more to tell really. Did some shopping this morn, read a little, defreezed and de-contaminated my fridge (it really was disgusting), because yes, "oops I did it again" - I let the strawberries go rot. - I should simply not buy food that I do not plan to eat or can't make myself eat. It really broke my heart, but these days, I just don't eat much. Oh well.
My fridge is now pretty empty and clean. At least something.

Watched the prolouge to the TdF, and that was nice enough, even though Lance only came in as 3rd. At least he came in before Ullrich. Only thing I care about.
I know, I am weird for actually caring about pro cycling and enjoying it as a spectator sport. The pic that I paint of myself in these lines must appear very weird as a whole: but really, I am as non-consistent in RealLife, too.
So why do I like cycling, this doping ridden sport? Me who really doesn't care about spectator sports anyway. I only care about the Tour anyway. All started last year, with the Tour being in town, and seeing the great spectacle that surrounds it. Two days of cycling madness were enough to infect me with the cycling bug. And now the tour is on again, and near here, and I really don't want to miss it. The caravane, the show, the rush of colour that the peloton is when it passes.
What fascinates me about the Tour is the sheer distance. 3.500km. The trips through the Alps. The fact that those people get up every morn to ride their bikes again. The fact it's so extreme. The fact it's just such a big thing. I find the technicality fascinating, too. The amount of research that goes into the preparation, the food, the material everything (in some cases into doping, too).
Oh well. I just find it fascinating. And next weekend will be grande. My dad will come down here on Saturday morn, we'll get a rental car and drive into the mountains and go out for a posh dinner in Alsace, too. On Sunday, we'll watch the tour again, before he heads home that afternoon. Nice short trip & father/daughter activity. Should be lots of fun.

That's it really for today. Calm. Okay. Only icky thing was that Britta dropped by to annoy the hell out of me. And give me the second negative feedback on the pic on my desktop. I should turn the puter off when someone drops by. She just sucks. And I just do not plan to discuss some things with her. Ever. Like why I like rope bondage. And do not care about her opinion at all.